Our Story

18 month appointment was during COVID. Everyone masked. Very minimal personal interaction. 5 minute doctor appointments, although doctor appointments were our normal with a child who had blood in their stool from 2 weeks old, 20+ ear infections, RSV x 2, pneumonia once, and infant asthma. But this visit was different.

He crawled on time. He walked on time. He said a few words around 6 months old. He smiled. He laughed. He made eye contact. Until around 16 months those skills started to regress. He had a pretty severe cause of double pneumonia at 15 months old, a mothers worst night mare. We were on daily inhalers, nebulizers and every thing you can possibly think of for about 5 weeks. After this we notice Michael stopped turning to our voices. He started running back and forth down our new house continuously. We thought his hearing had went from one of his 20+ ear infections (although this still did not help Michael’s speech and language) his hearing is completely fine and we had it tested with an ABR sedated hearing test. We were first time parents. We didn’t know. Although I am not sure any autism parent “knew” because every kid is so different on the spectrum its hard to say “AH THATS IT!”

I filled out the 18 month MCHAT checklist before our rushed pandemic appointment. I was honest. At this time we still didn’t think Michael could hear. Michael had 3 red flag components on his 18 month MCHAT. Although I thought this evaluation as a first time mom was something for discussion between you and your pediatrician. There was no discussion. This pediatrician definitely did not deliver the news in the most caring, loving, motherly way possible, those were the words she said “he failed his MCHAT. There is red flags, you don’t teach a child how to point and you never will. I recommend you see a developmental ped. Although I think Michael will do fantastic in life this is what you are faced with”

I left that appointment crying. Confused. I had zero guidance. No one told me what to do next. No one. I had no friends with children that had delays, I was the first of many of my friends to have a baby. We cried. We cried for weeks. If we couldn’t ever teach him how to point how would we ever teach him how to say a word again, or look at us.

For the next several weeks. I questioned everything I did as a mother. Down to the second I conceived him. Because that’s what us as mothers do, blame ourselves. I never thought I would feel connected to my son again. I was 3 months pregnant with our second child and our whole world had been flipped upside down. How was I going to care for a child with needs and a newborn baby. How was I possibly going to ever be enough for both of them. News flash into the future our second baby is THE BEST thing we have ever done for Michael. And then I went into fight mode. For the next several months I found the best therapies for Michael (typical therapy and other therapy I found to help in my own research you may read more on my Therapies page). I researched day in and day out. We started to fight. We grew confident and connected to our son. We knew who was right for him and who was not.

Michael was officially officially diagnosed with ASD at 3. After a year long wait list to see the developmental pad, we finally were in. After navigating our journey alone for 18 months Michael’s diagnoses was peaceful for us. We had already figured out the world of Autism before his diagnoses had services in place, therapist in place. We had amazing people on our side who love our boy no matter what. And that’s the most beautiful thing I have learned about being an autism mom. You are never alone. This community is a beautiful, beautiful place.

Our journey doesn’t just stop with Autism, we a lot of things we have been able to help control and heal that come with Autism like; food allergies, GI inflammation, brain inflammation, hypoglycemia, nutritional decencies from leaky gut, and I am sure the list goes on and my mom brain cannot remember right now. I hope you find our blog helpful, real, honest, raw and if its not for you or how you view autism that’s okay I am a strong believer that everyone has their own path and own opinions I just ask you leave peacefully.